Challenge within a challenge: Girl power praise

A few months ago Paperchase, one of my favourite shops started selling a card set with strong messages that caught my eye. I bought a few to begin with to send to a few women in my life.

The question that came to me immediately was who would I write the cards to? With social media and wanting to tell people about positive things, if I missed someone out they might question why they didn’t get a card? So I tried to write to as many women that were in my life as I could. These ranged from relatives, old work colleagues and close friends.

In each card I wrote what I admired about that person, applauded any changes or challenges they had been through and how if they were having a tough day, reading the card would give them a boost. Writing the cards was not to get likes or Facebook posts dedicated to me. Of course, it would have been nice to have an acknowledgement for receiving the card, for the simple reason to check whether Royal Mail was working and that it had not have been lost in the post, but I was fine without it. I didn’t contact people asking if they had received their card. If I did that, it felt like I was chasing praise, which I did not want. I asked one of my sisters if she received a card and it was awkward as she didn’t realise she had to tell me that she got her card.

I then expanded writing cards to friends that were fading or had faded for my life. It wasn’t a sign for them to give our friendship another go, far from it. The reason I wrote to this group of people was that they had all contributed in a small way to being who I am today.

Once the ball was rolling on writing the cards, I wrote to four women that had helped my career in someway. It’s not everyday you can express gratitude for somebody that has helped, supported or stood up for you in your career, so I took this as an opportunity to do so.

The whole process wasn’t easy. There were some cards I struggled to write. This was when it took time to come up with things I admired about that person; this could be due to me not knowing that person very well, or their strengths not being so prominent in comparison to others. Or if one of the fading friends had hurt me in the past, could I move on from that or not?

Like most of my projects/tasks/challenges I give myself, it turned out way bigger than I thought. I wrote to 67 women in total. (Two cards has yet to be posted as I haven’t got their addresses even though I asked.) Around a third of the women I wrote I got no reply, and that’s really okay. Some people do not know how to deal with random gratitude that comes through the letterbox. A few sent me a brief message saying thank you, others stated what traits they admired in me which wasn’t the intention and it made me feel a bit uneasy as it would come off that this was a boosting my own ego project which wasn’t the case. A few replies provided me with closure on certain friendships that had been in the balance. I felt I could draw a line and move on. One even wrote saying they had been a terrible friend and I shouldn’t have wasted my time writing to them. As I’m living till 105, I got a few minutes to spare.

There was one message that stood out from all the rest, and that was from my old friend Kirsty. We had in fact been best friends since sixth form and I was her maid of honour at her wedding. Then three years ago she stopped replying to my messages for no reason. There was no big argument, no big event or scene, she just disappeared. It took a long time to accept and move on. I often thought it was because I didn’t have children and she did and wanted to hang out only with other mums. However that didn’t make sense as she had said when she was pregnant she wanted to still be friends so she had some entertainment in her life.

Her card was one of the toughest cards to write. Questions of should I leave her in the past or not went through my mind. There was no guarantee of a reply, would I be okay with a reply furthermore? There might have been something I’d done wrong that hadn’t realised. She sent two messages to me within a day of each other. The first thanking me, and I saw that as closure. But then a second message came and it said about how she’d been going through a tough time over the past few years and she got into a bad crowd and lost contact with some people including myself. The cards although intentionally were set out to give people a boost, it also gave an opportunity to make amends.

I’m not sure what the future holds for my friendship with Kirsty, I’ve said we can try and rebuild it, and we have met up a couple of times since the card, and a third time to meet up has been arranged.

I’ve found at first writing the cards was a bit odd, but the more I wrote to people and thought about the highs and lows these women had been through, the easier it was to praise their achievements and their strength.

Gratitude and praise is an area that can be tricky. It’s far more easier to see the negative and complain about things. Praising somebody’s personality and achievements takes a lot more effort. With some of the letters women said it came through at the right time; they’d been having a tough week or day and it lifted their spirits. It may not be for everyone, but I’m glad I took the time to write to those 67 women. Maybe try writing to one person you admire, as corny as it sounds it may make their day!

Challenge within a challenge: To be tidy and have less; once and for all

Every year since around the age of 10 I have given myself the new years resolution of wanting to be tidy. And every year I fail. I always find something better to do than tidy up. I also have a problem in that I have a lot of stuff. I’m not a hoarder, but I just seem to have a lot of things. I’m not a shopaholic, yet I always have bags of things to be sorted.

I guess the main time I accumulated a big amount of material posessions was when I was at uni, and I have thrown out a large amount of these items since. But life goes on and you need new things as you acquire new skills or new tastes.

I’ve seen those challenges around of chucking out one thing per day and increasing it during a 30 day stint. What I want to do is have throwing out things as part of my daily routine. As bold as it sounds I want to throw out 2-5 things everyday. It may seem bold, but I’ve started doing an audit of exactly how many posessions I own. I haven’t finished that task as it’s a working progress, but with close to 150 DVDs and 45 items of gym wear, I know I can start getting rid of stuff easily.

It won’t be straight into the bin. The things I throw out will be either given to charity or recycled.

Following my journalism degree, I’ve always had a large amount of magazines and paper in general. Years ago I used to collect In Style magazine as I thought it made me sophisticated. And I thought piling up my collection, like Carrie Bradshaw did in Sex and the City with her Vogue magazines would be stylish. What it looked like was a mess and that I was a hoarder. And I decided to weigh my collection which was around 4-5 years old, and it weighed half my body weight!

Today I watched a great documentary on Netflix called Minimalism: A Documentary about Important Things and it was really interesting. And while I may not reach true minimalism, it’s made me realise that most of the stuff I have, I don’t need. I thought this for a while, but now is the time to truly attack the mass of possessions that I own.

I’ll keep a log of what I throw out. Throwing out rubbish such as packaging waste for recycling won’t count as it’s general waste. I think that the first few weeks it will be easy, a bit like with weight loss, the pounds go down a little faster in the beginning. It’s the weeks and months that follow that it slows down. But I hope if I build this little task into my daily routine, my mind-set may shift and hopefully I will own a lot less by the end of the year.

So let 2018 begin, with more tidying and hopefully less possessions!

Challenge within a challenge: Back in events

Challenges come in all shapes of sizes; in our daily lives we can be challenged, even if we don’t set these challenges ourselves.

From 2009 to the start of 2013 I worked in events, and then until February this year I worked in team support and PA roles. However, this sort of work was mundane to me and it made me realise I wanted to work back in events. Getting back into events work was a challenge enough as the large majority of the time potential recruiters and employers could only see my most recent employment in support roles and not see beyond that, and the fact that I had 5 years of solid events experience.

Last year I decided to take matters into my own hands and in a small way try to make things happen, and started volunteering at charity networking events to get my foot back into events. I did this for a year and as a result of volunteering, the company I was doing this for actually did recruitment as well, and ultimately put me forward for the job I’m now in today.

I’ve been in my current job since the start of February and it’s been a bit of adjustment getting back into events. I thought it would be easy but there is a difference between being busy as a PA and busy in an events role.

Tomorrow I start working on a week long course which is a very high in demand revision course for 150 delegates total spread over 5 days. The set up and the days themselves are complex and long. I was at work on Friday night till 8.45 setting up with my manager. There are lot of circuits of different materials and different sets of timings that all the delegates have to abide to. The real kicker is I have to be at work at 6.30am, and commuting in it will be a really early start for me (3 or 4am!)

There are several things I’m nervous about; exactly how tiring will it be? How will I keep up the energy up, it will fill like Groundhog Day as every day is an identical set up. Will I make mistakes?
I was thinking to the last 5-day event that I worked on was back in 2012. It was a 5-day residential course which took place in Loughborough. It was a great week, the faculty were lovely and the core team of me, the events coordinator Emma and our colleague Ashley from Washington worked really well together. Ashley and I became quick friends (as pictured below) and she showed me to Michael Buble singing about Russian Unicorns which will always make me laugh. I still hope to visit Ashley one day in Washington. Although it was a long week, surprisingly I still had time to train for Tough Mudder everyday in the gym for an hour as soon as the gym was open. I’ve no idea how I managed to get the energy for that and how I was still standing, but somehow I did.

With tomorrow I’m hoping that my neighbours don’t have late night parties tonight (letters have been posted.) My outfits for the week have been planned, my evening light meals will by the end of today will have been made. I plan to read some of my favourite books each night before bed, and listen to a Desert Island Disc each night to help me sleep. Eat, commute, work, commute, read, relax, sleep repeat will be my week. Bring on Friday evening!

Challenge within a challenge: Giving Lent a go

Firstly, apologies for not blogging in nearly 2 months! It’s hard to believe it’s been that long, but in short I’ve got a new job, and my months’ notice at my last job was very stressful and it’s taken a bit of time to adjust to my new job. Hopefully I can blog on a more regular basis from now on.

I’m not really religious. I was brought up going to Quaker meeting and know about the Quaker faith. Last year I started, but albeit did not complete a challenge to read the bible every day for 30 days. However by reading some passages I can see why people have the bible as a source of support.
Traditionally you give up something for Lent to ‘purify’ their bodies, so usually a certain food or alcohol. With so much talk about it in the office, I wondered what I could give up and then it hit me, I could give up films!

As I said in my last post, through not going to the cinema for the year I felt more creative than normal, so by having no films to watch my creativity may increase even more.

I’ve become quite spoilt with films since I started getting the Sky Movie channels and Sky Movies on demand for free. It’s meant I’ve started a particularly bad habit; starting a film but not finishing it and picking another film instead that seems better. There is too much choice and as a result I don’t give films a chance to grow and develop. With the number of film channels I have; myself and Rachel average around 3 films a week, occasionally it’s more or less. That’s a lot of time I’m wasting. A lot of time I could spend doing something else.

There are several things I could do; catch up on TV shows I’m behind on, finish a few of the many books I’ve started, finish a screenplay and start another, more volunteering and many more things. I could even see about completing a few challenges I didn't complete last year, including the bible one.

Lent is also a time of reflection and I’ve started to be in a reflective mood about the future, so I’ll have more time to explore my thoughts.

Of course I may isolate myself a bit as a result, as Rachel still watches films, but as it’s only 40 days it’s not a lifetime.

I’m excited to see how the 40 days pan out; whether I find it easy or a challenge. And whether it has a lasting impact; will I watch less films afterwards? Will my habits of starting a film but not finishing it change?

So it’s lights, camera, action for Lent!

Challenge within a challenge: Surviving a year without cinema

At the start of the year I had a few new year resolutions. I think I said that I wanted to learn to juggle and learn how to fence, but with most if not all resolutions, they don’t last or happen. However, one new year resolution did. Apart from the one exception of going to a movie marathon for my flatmate Rachel’s birthday, which I mentioned before starting the challenge, I haven’t been to the cinema once!

So how was it? To be honest I didn’t miss going to the cinema as much as I thought I would. There were only a few times where I really wanted to see a film but had to miss out. I got asked to go and see Bridget Jones’ Baby a couple of times with different sets of people and because I loved the book so much I wanted to see Me Before You. Apart from those two there were quite a few films I wanted to see, but I wasn’t too fussed ultimately about missing them on the big screen.

In a strange twist of luck in February I got an email from Virgin Media saying that the TV package I was on they were fading out and that they were putting me on the Sky Movie package at no extra cost! So without even trying I got way more of a selection of films then I would get at the cinema at any one time.

With the resolution I thought that some friendships might wane as a result. Ones where the main activity we’d do would be to go to the cinema. Some friendships we did alternative activities and others I just saw less as a result of not going to the cinema. Or it could be that people were busier in 2016.

I’ve come to realise that going to the cinema isn’t a great way of catching up with friends. You meet up just before, and you leave just after the film and that barely gives time to chat. 2 hours in a dark room isn’t that social. So I think going into 2017 I’m going to go to the cinema, but only films that I really want to go to and worthy of seeing on the big screen.

During the year I missed out on just over 25 films, so financially I saved. With every film I missed I read an autobiography, and I’ve fallen a little behind on this. I’ve got about 3-4 books to go. They are my favourite genre of books, but towards the end of the year I got a bit sick of them. I’ve read a great variety; ranging from entrepreneurs to dancers to everyday people overcoming adversity.

Throughout this year I was also more creative than I’ve been in previous years. But I don’t know whether that has anything to do with going to screenwriting and creative groups or cinema being absent.

The challenge was an interesting one; one that I thought I would break but ultimately didn’t. Looking through my IMDB watchlist there’s half a dozen films on there which will be released in 2017. But truthfully only half of them I really want to see.

So here’s to 2017; a year of spending less time sitting in silence and more time in the light.

Challenge within a challenge: A novel idea take two

Way back in April my friend Hayley and I decided to try and wrote a novel in a month. With Hayley getting married and life getting in the way for me, we both didn’t complete our novels.

November is the National Novel Writing Month and the month has been running since 1999. I’d heard of it before but it was only through one of Hayley’s friends putting it on Facebook that I was reminded of it again.

With a quite-ish November I thought I’d give the novel another go. The site says that you should have a fresh idea, but you can work on existing ideas as well. So I’m picking up with Mr Hunter and I. As I’ve said before the novel is based on my job hunting days as and as they are still happening it’s good to write what is happening to me into the characters’ story.

Like screenwriting the first draft is always the worst; it’s just an achievement to get something down in writing. At the moment my first draft is pretty patchy, doting around all over the place and the constant struggle of writing he said and she said all the time. I’ll be looking at different books for ideas of how to vary it up. Giovanna Fletcher and Cecelia Ahearn books will be a good place to start.

So here’s to a second try at the novel. Hopefully I’ll write more than the first attempt.

Challenge within a challenge: No cinema update

How is it October already? Just like every year it seems this year has gone by really fast. And apart from the movie marathon I went to back in May for my friend Rachel’s birthday, I haven’t been to the cinema!

A couple of weeks ago I came close to going to the cinema as the group I was with on the National Trust holiday went to see Bridget Jones’s Baby and it was the second time somebody had asked me to go and see that film. But I stayed strong and didn’t go.

With every film I’ve wanted to see at the cinema, I’ve read an autobiography instead. I have got a little bit behind in this and got 12 books left to read, which is roughly one book a week till the end of the year. People have asked me why I’ve decided to read autobiographies instead. I just thought it would be good to read about different people’s lives and experience different narratives, which is what you would experience in the cinema anyway.

Thankfully with the weather getting colder and getting a new corner sofa courtesy of my neighbours, I’ll be able to read the remaining books in comfort.

Challenge within a challenge: Short films

This year as you know I’ve been going to a screenwriting and creative networking events on a regular basis which are really beneficial. I really enjoy talking to other screenwriters and creative people in general as it you always leave feeling motivated and full of ideas.

There’s one thing that’s been suggested to me a couple of times in these events, which I was also thinking of as well that is the natural next step in my screenwriting, and that’s to write and eventually make a short film. The reason is firstly they are a great way of profiling your work and writing style, but it could perhaps be easier to be made on my own steam.

In terms of short film knowledge, mine is very limited. A few months ago with Coops and Fran we watched 4 short films as part of a film festival in a box set I got years ago from an old boyfriend. But I’d only just got round to watching them. The concept is simple with the set; you watch 4 films which all had the theme of love and be like a judge at a film festival and decide which one is the best. The films in the box were all completely different and made in different styles and they ranged in length; from 2 minutes to 12.

I’ve already got ideas for 2 short films and at first thought I think with short films you can be more expressive in completely different ways.

With a limited knowledge I definitely need to watch more short films to see exactly what can be done in 15 minutes or under. So for 30 days in July starting today I’m going to watch a short film a day.
Not knowing where to start I asked the creative group I go to for their suggestions. I put something on their Facebook group and within minutes I got quite a few recommendations, so I’m going to work through them and see what other ones come up.

I’m looking forward to seeing what short films I’ll see and what ideas I’ll come up with as a result. And if anyone has any suggestions for short films to watch let me know.

Challenge within a challenge: Getting back on the radar

For any regular readers, you would have noticed I’ve gone a bit quiet recently. I checked and the last time I blogged about any new challenges was back in April! Now when I go off the radar, usually my family thinks it’s because I’ve got a new boyfriend, which isn’t the case here. At the moment dating wise I seem to be going on dates with lots of frogs, but have yet to find a prince yet. But for some reason life seems to have got in the way of my challenges.

I’m still on the never ending job hunt, and then I got a secondment at work, which has meant for the short term I am doing 2 full time jobs at the same time until they find a new me for my old job. Speaking to other colleagues who have been in a similar boat, this arrangement could last for up to 4 months! As a result I come home shattered without much energy for anything else.

With the new role and me being a social butterfly, it seems that the challenges have taken a back seat, and ultimately I haven’t completed them, meaning I’ve failed them.

I think from memory there are 3 challenges I started but haven’t completed: Health awareness, bible reading and writing a book in a month. Not completing these challenges is a good thing, it shows I’m human for one. Nobody is perfect and not every goal you reach for is met. I remember my cousin Miriam asking where do I find the time for all these things and over the past few months time has escaped me.

I will go back and try and complete these challenges as I feel I will get something out of them, but for now with my current work situation I’m going to downsize the challenges I set for the time being.

The next few weeks I’ll use as a catch up to reflect on some challenges I’ve done in previous months that I haven’t shown the outcome of. With July and August I’ll be setting myself one (yes ONE) challenge for each month, both which will be beneficial for my screenwriting.

Now from the outset, these challenges I set myself aren’t life defining in the grand scheme of things. The failure of these haven’t had an impact on my life; I haven’t lost any money, my health hasn’t been effected and it hasn’t impacted any of my friends or family. But I haven’t achieved what I set out to do.

As you may know I love a good quote and I was trying to find ones about failure, but they all seem a bit grand. I did find one which I don’t seem to high and mighty. ‘No human ever became interesting by not failing. The more you fail and recover and improve, the better you are as a person. Ever meet someone who’s always had everything work out for them with zero struggle? They usually have the depth of a puddle. Or they don’t exist.’ Chris Hardwick.

So onto the next challenges!

Challenge within a challenge: Nice day for a white wedding

As I said in my previous post the weekend was a busy one, and on Saturday I went to my friends Kate and Dan’s wedding!

I have to say it was one of the best weddings I’ve ever been to and I think that’s due to the people. Quite a few weddings I’d know maybe 2 or 3 people other than the bride and groom. But this wedding I knew way more, so there were lots of people to hang around with.

I’ve known Kate and Dan for many years as myself, my friend Rachel, Alice and Kate and Dan used to go for nights out together. We also went on a great camping trip together last year as well.

With no boyfriend at the moment I took my friend Ro as my +1 and we had a great time. I can’t remember the last time I danced nonstop. I’d finally found the perfect footwear for a wedding; some nice navy blue wedges that didn’t make my feet achy and I could dance freely in.

But add to the dancing an evening buffet which I ate very quickly meant I was dancing with a food baby. By the time I got back home, after an epic Disney singalong in the car, I was shattered with an achy belly.

When it came to my dress, I got it from Dave’s (as always) for the grand price of £3. The jacket I got on the morning of the wedding!

I asked Kate which charity is hers and Dan’s favourite and they said Cancer Research and RSPCA, so I’ve made small donations to both charities as I wore a dress.

Challenge within a challenge: Reuniting over a good book

With the summer months upon us, and hopefully normal summer temperatures, this means I’ll get to wear some nice dresses. And this means that it will count towards my dress challenge and I’ll donate some more money to charity in the process.

This weekend has been a very busy one, I’m shattered! I went to a wedding which I’ll blog about tomorrow. Today I went to a book signing to meet the great Giovanna Fletcher!

I’m a big fan of her books, well the ones I’ve read. I’ve read Dream a Little Dream, which I thought she wrote about me as the main character Sarah had lots in common with me. Her book You’re The One That I Want I read while queuing up for rides at Disneyland. And on the last few pages my sisters were chanting; ‘Read it, read it’ as I finished the book.

Upon hearing about the book signing on one of Giovanna’s (or Gi as she’s known) YouTube videos I immediately thought of an old school friend called Carly. We follow each other on Instagram and when I posted about reading Gi’s books, Carly commented saying she was a fan of Gi as well because of the YouTube videos.

I sent a message to Carly asking if she wanted to go and we hadn’t seen each other since school, so well over 10 years. And she thought it was a great idea. So we went to Milton Keynes today and had a lovely catch up.

When we met Gi she asked if we were sisters and we explained that we were old school friends and hadn’t seen each since then and that her book signing was our little reunion and she loved that. I also gave her a recipe as she’s a big Nutella fan and I have a great recipe for oaty banana and Nutella muffins.

I wore a little pink dress today, which I bought from New Look years ago, no doubt in the sale. Gi recently did a video about Wrigley’s Extra’s ‘Extra Smile Back Project and the money raised from that will go their chosen charity partner; Action for Children. So I’ve made a little donation to that.

Challenge within a challenge: Exam success!

Just over a month ago I took my Life skills Maths Level 2 exam. I was pretty worried about the result as I was answering questions right until the end, and I didn’t have time to thoroughly check my answers.

But good news….I passed! I got 33/48 which is 69%. So I’m pretty pleased with that. The hard work paid off.

So what happens now? Well passing the level 2 exam means I’m now at the right level for retaking my GCSE Maths, which I assume will start in September.

Then the real hard work begins. It might be that being in the maths frame of mind means I find classes easier. And unlike my maths GCSE there isn’t a prom as a distraction this time round.

Challenge within a challenge: A novel idea

For the past few months I've been in reading mode, and with my screenwriting stepping up a gear last month I thought I’d combine both of these things and…..write a novel in 30 days!!!

As you can see I've always been into books!

Believe it or not there is already a ‘National Novel Writing Month’ that takes place every year, so there’s a lot of like-minded people out there.

My friend Hayley and I couldn’t wait till November so we’re both motivating each other to write a novel. I think with a challenge like this it’s great to have someone else on board.

There are 50,000 words to write in 30 days which is roughly 1,666 words a day. I will admit that I’m a little behind, however with screenwriting in the past, some days I surpass my targets considerably. And if I’m in writing mode then sometimes there’s no stopping me.

So what is my book about? Well I’m not going to say as the idea is in the very early stages. It’s semi-autobiographical but with a different way of looking at an important element of my life. I will however tell you the title and it’s ‘Mr Hunter and I.’

I'm enjoying the challenge so far, and Hayley has had to stop and rethink her plot and spend a few days drafting ideas, but she’s enjoyed what she’s written so far.

Here’s hoping for some April showers so I can stay indoors more and the book can get written faster.

Challenge within a challenge: A good start to retirement

On the 23rd March my mum retired from teaching. Her birthday was also on the 14th March, so as a belated birthday present I took her to see Cecelia Ahern give a talk at Kensington Waterstones. My mum and I have read most of Cecelia’s books, although some of them do blur into each other, so we’re not sure of which ones we've read. However her second book Where Rainbows End is one of my all time favourite books.

The talk was really interesting and it started off well as there were free cupcakes and drink. The cupcake had a fair bit of icing on so it was quite filling. We were two rows from the front and there was only around 20 people there, so it was nice and cosy.

Cecelia was talking about her new book called Flawed and it was her first young adult book she had written. So we got to hear an extract and then she discussed it as well as answering questions. Now last time I went to an author Q&A I missed my chance to ask a question as I was too nervous, so I wasn't going to let that happen again. I asked her the same question as I asked David Nicholls when I did eventually ask him a question at his book signing. I asked if she gets writers block and how she deals with it. She asked me if I wrote, and I said that I screen write and she said wow and I also said in April that my friend Hayley and I were trying to each write a book in a month and she seemed impressed by that. Her advice was great and similar to what I’d been doing with my latest screenplay. She also wished me and my friend luck in our challenge!

I wore a dress for the occasion and it was a Dorothy Perkins one I got a few years ago. I wore it when I was a Wedding Coordinator and at one wedding a guest turned up in the same dress! With any dress I wear I donate to charity and I donated to the National Literacy Trust which among other things gives books to disadvantaged children.

Challenge within a challenge: Getting my ideas heard

For today’s blog I get to talk about two of my favourite things; Greg James and Aussie Masterchef! 

Now Aussie Masterchef is being used to hypothetically cover something that happened a few weeks ago. I can’t actually say what, but I’m hoping this scenario and with your high intelligence and common sense (the sort that brings you to read my blog,) you’d figure out what I am going on about. But a major clue is it’s to do with something I do every weekday.

It’s a far stretch I know but for this you need to imagine I’m in Aussie Masterchef. Each week they have mystery box challenges were all the contestants have a box in front of them and they have to cook with whatever is inside the box. There are 20 odd contestants, but only 4 or 5 actually get picked to be tasted each week.

So I’ve been in the show for a while; George, Gary and Matt ask me week after week what my dishes are, but they don’t get tasted. They’re not strong enough, maybe they don’t meet the brief or maybe there are simply better dishes to try. Week after week it’s back to the drawing board, or should I say chopping board and to try and come up with a winning recipe.

A few weeks ago it looked like I got a winning recipe, or at least one that wants to be tried by Matt, George and Gary, and could progress further.

So what has this got to do with my blog? Well I wore a dress, a smart black work one, with some great maroon heels. A determined, serious outfit as I had a point to prove.

Now why am I talking about Greg James in this blog? He’s a radio 1 DJ who I've been a fan of for years. I’m such a big fan that my sister Lisa wrote to Greg asking if he could write me a birthday card, and he did! It was the best birthday card, and true to Lisa’s word she said she wouldn't be able to get a better card so why bother trying, and I haven’t got a birthday card from her since.

Greg did a great challenge for Sports Relief; to do five triathlons, in five days, in five cities, and he completed it! So for wearing the dress for ‘Aussie Masterchef’ I donated to Sports Relief.

Challenge within a challenge: Maths exam

As you may or may not be aware I have been going to Life Skills classes to improve my maths. The aim is to eventually retake my maths GCSE again, but the local college say you have to need a D in order to retake, and I have an E so back to class I went.

The classes I'm okay with doing once I'm there, but to be honest the feeling I get going and leaving them is the worst. People say they respect me going to try and improve a weakness, but weakness and failure is all I feel before and after. Failure that my life isn't where I want it to be in all areas and how no matter how hard I try to make things change and make them better things just aren't happening. It feels like it’s been 2 years of wading through treacle and although I'm getting myself out there, applying for new jobs, meeting new people, the results of all my efforts just aren't showing. And Maths for me is a weekly reminder of that for some reason.

I know it will only be temporary, the maths classes and indeed hopefully where my life is at the moment, but it’s frustrating all the same, when everyone you know is moving onto better things and when you want that to but things just aren't moving. In a sports situation at the moment I'm like and England cricketer who has been having a bad innings and then the commentator goes: ‘And then something extraordinary happened.’ I'm waiting for the extraordinary to happen.

But let’s get back to the maths, today I had my Level 2 Life Skills Maths exam, the last time I had a maths exam was when I was 16, which was 14 years ago! It was in a sports hall at the local college and there were around a dozen or so 18 year olds also doing exams. I instantly flash backed to how I was before exams; for one the sports hall at my school was huge and there was close to I reckon a hundred or so people taking exams at any one point. You could talk with your friends while waiting, going over last minute revision hints and tips, before everyone entering with a mass of nervous energy.

Today before my exam my mind went blank on averages; I was scouring my brain as if it was a filing cabinet trying to find the answers. And then the exam began; I read through all the questions before starting and there were a couple that were a little tricky.

During my revision I had been worried about not showing my workings out fully as that’s where I lost marks on my mock exam. But on one question in that mock my teacher said my workings out were too tedious and I didn't need to put that much detail. So since then and revising with my dad I had paranoia about what to put down in the working out. Miss the crucial first step in getting the answer and I’d lose the marks.

The time went way too quickly towards the end and I was writing right till the end. Usually I always have time to check answers, so I don’t know why this wasn't the case today.

I won’t know for a couple of weeks my results, but luckily my dad has set me another challenge which I’ll tell you about tomorrow to occupy my time.

Challenge within a challenge: Signed, sealed, delivered

The 30 day letter writing challenge was one that I knew I would enjoy. I've said in previous posts how much I like writing letters and there’s nothing better than receiving something in the post which isn't a bill.

So who did I write to? I wrote to 11 strangers, 8 friends, 5 family members, 3 friends of family or friends, 2 celebrities and myself!

The 11 strangers I wrote to were a combination of neighbours who I’d never met, and to people through More Love Letters. I discovered this site through reading an article about Hannah Brencher in Glamour magazine who started More Love Letters. Every few weeks the site puts up 4-5 people that have been nominated to receive love letters as they are going through a tough time and need a bit of love, so I write letters with words of encouragement to hopefully in some small way help.
I feel writing letters you can open up more than in a text message or email. I wrote to one of my friends explaining why I couldn't make her hen do, which was hard to write. Trying to write the right words and balance to ensure that it didn't look like I was hurting her feelings in the process. But I got a nice message back saying she completely understood my reasons.

Other letters I wrote were ones of opportunity. I wrote to Coops and Fran to organise a film night, I wrote to my friend ‘Meryl’ offering to cook her and her husband a meal as they’d been through a tough time, and I wrote to my cousins asking them if they wanted to visit as I barely feel like I know them which is a shame.

With letter writing you don’t do it to get replies. With writing to strangers, you don’t get replies, and some people are just really busy to find the time to reply to a letter; albeit whether it’s in a text or an email.

I wrote to 2 famous people, one of them being Jimmy Fallon and I wrote to him thanking him for doing his show as last year when I was going through a tough time it made me laugh quite a bit.
I wrote funny letters, including one to a family friend called Mike who I nickname Lionel as I think he looks like Lionel Ritchie. I wrote congratulating him on all ‘Lionel’s’ success with Glastonbury and how he’s already got a Vegas residency for this year.

And I wrote a letter to my future self. I read a book a few years ago about a site that allows you to write a letter to your future self, and it had a book with some of the letters submitted. I'm going to give the letter to my parents who in turn can give it to me in 10 years’ time. I've written what I want the future me to have achieved, what not to have done and hopefully the person she (I mean I) has become.

I'm going to carry on with the letter writing as it’s something I enjoy and it’s a simple thing that doesn't cost the earth to do. And I've got a few ideas for great letters to write in the near future.

Challenge within a challenge: The bible

One of my 30 day challenges for this month is to read the bible everyday. I have never read the bible before, or at least I can’t remember doing so. I don’t think I read it in R.E. at school, and I went to Quaker meeting with my dad and we didn’t read it there.

I saw this idea on a great challenge pin on Pinterest which someone had collected a lot of 30 day challenge ideas and put them in one long list. I thought this would be great challenge as I really am starting from scratch.

In terms of what I believe in I don’t really know. I know that sounds naïve in approach and by the age of 30 I should have an idea of what I believe in. I'm opening minded and non-judgemental, and I think that’s thanks to going to Quaker meeting growing up. Maybe this challenge will help me start to think of different beliefs or at least give me an insight into Christianity.

I didn't know where to begin with this challenge though; I didn't know whether I’d need to borrow the bible from the library, I didn't even know how the bible was set up apart from there being the old testament and new testament. However I did know quite a few people who knew these answers…..my relatives.

I contacted my Auntie Jean and Uncle Tony who I usually only see or hear from at Christmas and got a reply the same day with recommendations of what to read from the bible. They even said they would email me daily notes on the challenge, and I’ll take up that kind offer. My cousins Janet, Simon and their children (well my second cousins and aren't children anymore) Anna, James and his wife Katy all gave me recommendations of what to read as well.

My old housemates Lizi and Ro from uni also gave me some suggestions of what to read, as did Ro’s friend Mark who gave me a great list of readings and resources to go to.

I was amazed at how quick the responses came, and although I didn't know where to begin on what to read from the bible, I now have a structure for the month ahead. I'm simply going to work through the recommendations.

So far I've read the following:
Luke 7:24 KJV
Mark 1:14 KJV
The 3 day Loop for Women: New beginnings reading plan, which had the following passages;
2 Corinthians 5:17
2 Corinthians 3:5
Psalms 139:13

And I’m 2 days into the 7 day plan- Love Does Experience a Life of Love in Action, which has the following passages so far:
Deuteronomy 7:9
Matthew 28:20
I John 4:21
Psalms 89:33
Lamentations 3:22-33

I think with reading the bible some passages won’t necessarily sink in straight away and they may take a few reads before they have an effect. None of the passages have had an impact on me so far, but it’s still early days, so I’ll be interested to see how the challenge progresses.

Challenge within a challenge: Journaling

At the end of last year I did a 30 day minimalism challenge and one part of it was to journal for 20 minutes.  It was supposed to help organise my thoughts and de-stress. Now the last time I wrote in a journal or as Brits say a diary was back in uni. At school I did keep a little diary, but it wasn’t a dear diary thing, just the odd thought really. And it got quickly abandoned when I wrote the guys I fancied at school and my sisters got hold of the diary and told my parents at the dinner table who I fancied.

So my uni diary wasn't kept everyday but as anyone who’s gone to uni knows, you’re in a bubble where everything is magnified and dramas are even more dramatic then the real world. Following on my sisters reading the school attempt at a diary, I even made code names for guys I fancied, in case anyone read my diary.

Before I journalled for this challenge I read back some of diary. I’d actually read some of it back a couple of years ago with my friend Ro and it was very funny how seriously I took things, and how it really was the end of the world stuff. It was solid gold rubbish!

Not all of it was rubbish as the pages on the left were for thoughts and pages on the right were for quotes and song lyrics I liked, and they've stood the test of time.

The last time I wrote in the diary was 2009 I think, and the last passage was about me going for a job in Dubai. I even finished mid sentence, how dramatic! And the passage before was about my decision to end a long friendship; ‘Why be friends with someone who speaks with broken words.’ See really deep stuff, lol.

So what did I write in those 20 minutes of journaling? It was sort of a reflection piece really, what had happened in my life in 7 years and how nothing had gone the way I planned and of course there was my thoughts on guys as well. Really my diary entries hadn't changed at all.

I'm not going to keep the journaling up. I admire anybody that does; I've read a book of Richard E Grant’s diaries and they were a really interesting read. I think writing a diary had a good purpose in uni, but in the real world it’s just not for me right now.

Going back to my uni diary, at the end of it I wrote that the diary would be given to my friend Emma on the 17th September 2026. Yes when I'm 40, my friend Emma and I will be swapping our uni diaries…although everytime I remind her of this she says no straight away. Let’s see what happens in ten years!

Challenge within a challenge: Penpal from the past

As I said yesterday my challenge where I contacted 30 Facebook friends was a great success. One of the people I contacted was an old penpal and that’s what I’m going to write about today.

When I was growing up I loved receiving post and I still do. For a while I had quite a few penpals; I was penpals with Elizabeth who I went to school with but then moved away to Iceland. I also joined a penpal club through the Royal Mail I think it was called Hola. Here I got two penpals, the first was Florian from Germany. For some reason I thought Florian was a girl’s name, so imagine my surprise when I got a picture sent through and it turned out to be a boy!

I had another penpal from India and her name was Atreyee. When Facebook first came out I guess most people added people from their past as much as their present; old school friends mainly. I searched for Atreyee on the off chance she was on Facebook and she was.

I sent her a message when I was first on Facebook asking if she was the person I was penpals with growing up and she was. We sent each other a couple of messages to say where we were at in our lives and then got on with life.

With the challenge I thought it would be nice to check in and see how she was doing, as it had been 7 years since I sent that first message. I got a reply within a day and she sent me the nicest message. She’s now a mum of two and is on sabbatical from being a lawyer.

Being a letters fan, I always keep letters I receive as I feel letters quite often require more thought than emails. I looked back in a folder which I kept old school reports and certificates and found my penpal letters. I read through Atreyee’s she had a lovely way of writing; always kind and positive and telling me to make the most of life. I guess with these challenges I take on and things I want to try I feel I’m doing this. I don’t think I had an outlook on life like that when I was 13 or 14 which is when we were penpals, so she was wise before her years!

With her Facebook message she hasn't changed. She said how my Facebook posts are awesome and make her feel like there is so much more to life than her life as a lawyer. She said she’s trying to learn to cook, so I might send a few recipes her way.

She said that if I ever was to go to India I must make a stop at Delhi and catch up with her. I'm hoping one day I’ll take a trip and be able to meet Atreyee.